MASCULINITY, boy child, GBV, makhwapheni, money and husbands who beat up their wives and children, are some of the thorny issues discussed at the inaugural 2024 EmpowaMen series.
Held at the swanky EmpowerHouse, Ferndale, adorned with flowers, a large swimming pool and set in an elegant environment designed to facilitate meaningful connections and conversations among peers, it was bound to solicit distinctive and candid discussions.
Globetrotter and theatrical genius Dr John Kani, was the key speaker and bemoaned “lack of trust amongst men”.
“This is where the problem of masculinity begins, men not trusting each other for reasons known by each of you”, in reference to men only guests who attended the series on Saturday March 2, under the sunny weather but turned to God’s of rain the evening, a sign of ‘weakness amongst men’ he pointed out aloud.
The series are encouraged for men to heal themselves and society by engaging on subjects and sharing feelings they would normally internalise.
“Most men in South Africa grow up without the presence of a father or positive male figure. This often results in paternal wounds and destructive beliefs about masculinity, with young men looking to figures such as gangsters, abusers or absent fathers as role models.
In turn, this highlights the critical role of a positive male figure in shaping the minds of boys and men in our society,” pointed out Dr Kani, who flew in the previous day for the event.
GBV also can be stopped in its tracks by teaching, inspiring and healing men, be it a CEO or any boy child, through dialogues or workshops, he lamented, also picking up a bone with ‘national Government for all the ills being experienced from corruption to malfeasance taking shape under their nose’.
These kind of sessions always produce lively debate and rich, authentic personal stories of both struggle and triumph, as outlined by the likes of Reverend Joshua Mtanyelwa, Joburg based Sechaba Motsieloa, who is co-founder of EmpowaMen and Proverb- Metro FM’s daily-show presenter.
Addressing issues that prevent men from being able to conduct themselves as the natural born leaders, builders and fathers that they are begins with approaching them with compassion, not blame, agrees Proverb.
Lamented Motsieloa, holding men accountable need not take away from this most fundamental need — for people to be treated as if their feelings matter. “We look deeply into the reasons why men abuse, with the understanding that a reason is not an excuse.
The issue of abomakhwapheni was also debated, including being this well-mannered CEO at work; but at home you bash your wife and kids.
Our host for the day Simphiwe Masiza: CEO at Empowaworx, noted as men we need to ‘start thinking out of the box and take ownership of our shortcomings’ or else our ‘young boys and girls will soon realise it’s cool to beat or be beaten up’.
Various leading CEOs and SA’s decision makers made up of the likes of former editor at both City Press and Sunday World- Sandile “Magiya” Memela, advertising guru Happy Ntshingila, Mr Maponya, advocate Lesley Sedibe, and others, attended.
Phakamisa Zonke- an academic, believes “education is the only tool to change the behaviour of our boy-child, in that it instil responsibility, confidence and development of which the society would benefit from”.
Way forward insisted Masiza- to compile a study a report and implementations thereof.
As the sunset guests retreated to imbibing sought after beverages, braaied meat, puffed on cigars as they danced to soothing music to wrap up the almost heated discussion, and rain to cool down the mood.
During this month of March, a Summit EmpowaWomen will be held, and key note speaker is none other than Dr Phumzile Mlambo-Ngcuka, former deputy President of SA and former UN official.
Over 800 powerful women and girl-child will grace the Summit.
Visit: empowawomen.co.za for registration and more information.
All images SLM (Globetrotter Dr John Kani, addressing guests at the EmpowaMEN series held this past weekend).
